Saturday, January 19, 2008

Dear Camp Electric Youth

You'll be receiving my video audition shortly. Debbie Gibson, I've been waiting all my life for this moment. See you in July!

You can make your Electric Youth dreams come true too.

Dear Dry Pack Cannery

As part of my calling as co-chair of the Provident Living Committee (aka Temporal Welfare aka Food Storage, Employment & Financial Advisor), my co-chair and I organized a trip to the Dry Pack Cannery at Welfare Square for our ward. Five people showed (myself included) plus our second counselor in the bishopric. It's a proven fact that singles don't get uber excited about food storage but I can't see the harm in starting a small one for myself. True, I won't need 30 lbs of wheat, but hey, rice, sugar, dried apples, macaroni - sign me up for a can of each! I must admit I had a good time...even if I did have to get up at 7:30 on a Saturday morning. At least I know I'm earning heaven points and when the end of the world comes, I'll have my dried apples & starter kit to save me from starvation.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Dear Blog Readers

Thank you for convincing me I should stop being paranoid and return to granting everyone permission to view/read my random rantings. It's not like the CIA couldn't find a way to hack into it or the computer programmers/hackers/IT geniuses at work...

Dear POS 1998 Plymouth Breeze

Please stop squeeling when I turn the steering wheel.
You have power steering fluid.
I know it's cold, don't see me squeeling every time I turn a corner.
Keep this up and I'll get a new car...sooner rather than later.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Dear January 15

Dear Wells Fargo -
I hate you. You suck. Give me back my money.

Dear Creeper -
Stop talking to me. Stop looking at me. Stop emailing me - I don't care if it's my job. Just stop. Stop. Stop.

Dear Cute Little Kids everywhere,
Thank you for being so cute. You make me want to be little again. Simpler times.