If I could be snowboarding right now or sometime over the weekend, I would be very happy to have you around. Unfortunately, I am leaving to CA and you have delayed my flight. I hate you.
Dear Delta Automated Customer Service Voice,
Thank you for informing me that my flight was delayed. If you had told me it was canceled or rescheduled for tomorrow, I would have had to throw my phone. And then IT would have not been very happy with me.